Ever since I was diagnosed with RA, I have held myself to a much higher standard as far as pushing myself to DO EVERYTHING YOU CAN, even if you don’t want to, even if you just plain shouldn’t.
And if I fail to cram a million things in, I feel just that…failure.
Trying to live an overcommitted life while also sharing the life with dang RA…I set myself up for that a lot.
The funny part is that prior to diagnosis, if I didn’t have time or didn’t want to do something or just simply found a better option, I didn’t give a rats ass about bailing. I remember thinking ‘screw the spin class. I work very hard. I deserve a night on the couch.’
I have various theories as to why I now am very concerned about multiple little rat booties but those don’t matter.
Because tonight I blew off the gym to go to the gym. More specifically, I blew off the whole working out part and instead plopped my bathing suit clad rear in the hot tub and then the steam room and then back to the hot tub. Taking away feelings of failure one fantastic jet on my back at a time!
If I could somehow find a way to navigate my day from a tub of hot jetted water, my joints would be happy, happy, happy! Alas, that could make sales presentations interesting.
Normally, I’d come home and be disappointed in myself but when I really thought about it, I really see no point. How am I failing when I’ve done something good for myself? Sure, it wasn’t cardio persay but it is still healthy and now I feel great!
Take It Back Tuesday: I’m taking back realistic expectations and the ability to make a healthy compromise.
What are you taking back?