I realized it awhile back and got super depressed about it.
It’s not that I didn’t KNOW, its that, in my mind, it couldn’t apply to me.
I took a blogging break because I didn’t want to write and spew depression.
And then my buddy, RA Superbitch, passed away. I never addressed it on here because I just didn’t know how to.
The anxiety deepens.
I was forwarded a blog written by Sara Frankl-gitzengirl.blogspot.com- last week. Sara has AS and is in hospice.
I read the whole thing Friday night and bawled my eyes out.
It’s just so unfair.
None us of asked for this. None of us deserve this.
There are so many things I want for myself and I am scared shitless I won’t get to because of this damn disease.
Don’t get me wrong…I know that mine is easily controlled and currently under control…but who knows what tomorrow will bring, right?
I’m feeling a lot like I did when I was first diagnosed which scares me. I am pissed. I am sad. I am oh-so-frustrated. But most of all, I am terrified.
This really is happening, isn’t it?
So what do we do now?