I’ve been going through some things lately…a lot of which I don’t really want to blog…but it all comes back to the fact that I’M SO FREAKING TIRED OF BEING REMINDED THAT I HAVE RA.
I go shopping.
I want these.
I have dinner with friends and we talk about our latest adventures.
They’ve done this.
I have not. Nor can I. Not that I would really want to…but I would at least like that to be MY decision to make. Summers with RA can be really hard.
I’ve reached the age in my life where we’re now starting to have that elusive thing called “disposable income.”
My friends are buying this.
OOOOHHHH, how I need that right now.
But instead, I’m buying this.
It just sucks. Really sucks.
My friends are nauseous from either drinking too much the night before or from being pregnant. (Obviously, the pregnant person is not nauseous from drinking too much. Just had to make that clear. THAT would be a serious problem!) Me- I’m nauseous from methotrexate. And let me tell you, that does WONDERS for my moods. Things that would normally bother me a little bit end up being THE. BIGGEST. DEAL. IN. THE. ENTIRE. WORLD. Example: a normal person understands when a restaurant screws up a catered lunch for a client. Understands and is not thrilled…but doesn’t attribute it to a vast conspiracy network. No, my dear, the service industry is not out to get you.
And then someone who really doesn’t know you tells you to find the “bright side” of having this thing. “Think of how much you’ve grown personally and how much you’ve learned about life in dealing with this.”
To which I politely say “how do you know I wouldn’t have learned those things about myself and about life WITHOUT this thing?”
Nope, there’s an ice cube’s chance in hell that I’ll ever be thankful to have RA.
I just sit around, sometimes I lay around, with what I like to call “flare hair.”
I know I went kinda picture crazy with this post. But a picture speaks a thousand words. So I gave you SIX pictures. Can’t you see the disparity that I’m seeing right now?
So that’s kinda where I’m at right now.
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.