Excuse the language. Or if it bothers you, just skip this entry. I’m still a little upset.
“No, I don’t run anymore because I have Rheumatoid Arthritis.”
Momentary awkward pause while his hot little brain mulled this tidbit over.
“But…but…but you’re so pretty…”
ARE YOU A F*CKING IDIOT?
At what point do you think that something like that would affect me having or not having RA or anything else for that matter?
Do you think immune systems ‘immuno-select’ who gets these things based on how people look or how much is in a bank account or what their last name is?
DID YOU FALL AND HIT YOUR HEAD ON CONCRETE?
That argument has just as much validity as you being very honest and telling me that “I’m dumb as a brick” and me responding with a whiny “but you look like an Abercrombie model.”
And what do I say to something like that? Um, thanks? I think?
That’s almost as offensive as telling someone who’s lost 2 pounds that they look “SO MUCH BETTER.”
I mean SERIOUSLY?
Can you at least follow it up with a well placed question like maybe ask me what RA is? Anything? I realize that would ask an awful lot of the gerbil running the wheel in your head but just leaving it at that and then uncomfortably staring at me makes you look like Lord of the Douche, getting ready to do a little jig for me, and makes me feel awful about myself.
Yes, I know Mom. I know I am being rude here. You’re right- I was raised better than that. No, please don’t give me the guilt trippy “I’ve raised horrible children” speech. You’ve made that point numerous times in my life and I forgive you for making me so mean sometimes. (I kid.) Yes, I will make sure to let everyone know that you sent me to Cotillion. Twice. Yes, I know it was expensive and I’m not entirely sure it was money well spent. Yes, I think you’re right that maybe his parents didn’t send him because maybe (gasp) they didn’t think it was important.
I’d like to point out that it is YOUR daughter here, valedictorian of Cotillion, who is posting f-bombs online.
But seriously, “you’re so pretty?”
You’ve got to be kidding me.