7 Year Diagnosiversary

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So you break a mirror, you get 7 years of bad luck, right?

Happy 7th RA Diagnosiversary to me!

If my RA was a human child, the little Satan spawn would be a first grader. Perfecting how to read, starting to get sassy, developing a sense of humor, playing all the requisite 7 year old games. Heck, it may even have its own Facebook page. All in all, it would be growing more independent of me and preparing to leave my house in 11 short years.

In reality, RA itself is very much like that kid. Except my RA specifically is Doogie Howser. Let’s check off some milestones, shall we?

Learning how to read: while it certainly can’t read aloud to me in bed from my Nook (which would be pretty stellar for it to do by the way, maybe consider it a type of body rent?), it can certainly ‘read’ when it would be inconvenient to show up and have a temper fit. My RA needs to be strong armed to the restaurant bathroom for an attitude adjustment, in my opinion. So reading, at a very high abstract level: check.

Sassy. Sense of humor. Playing games…these are all very similar and detailing all of these is…well…part of the point of this blog. Read back some and I think the evidence speaks for itself. Check, check, and check.

Having its own Facebook page? Duh. It got that in 5k. It is well connected via social media. Check.

Preparing to leave my house in 11 short years? I sure as hell hope. I sure as hell am working *diligently* to make that happen. Diligently I say! I would be thrilled to lose custody early. But just in case, Orencia boarding enrollment is completed and right now, it’s parent day at orientation. I hope to soon see your teary red face in the rearview mirror. Partial very faint check.

I’m still not sure if I broke a mirror or if I just have some sort of blood sucking demon attached to me. Seven years of bad luck…I’m curious to see what the next seven bring.

Happy Diagnosiversary RA! Mama’s gonna go have some wine and hope CPS removes you soon enough!

Note: I would NEVER EVER have these emotions toward a real human child.

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10 responses »

  1. I wish I could write like you!! You had me howling with laughter … but I was relieved to read the note at the end, especially after the ‘teary red face in the mirror’ comment! :-)

    • Thanks Polly! Yeah, I finished it and read back through and realized it sounded like I hate kiddos. That is far from true!!!

  2. That is so spot on!!! I have a 42 year old who refuses to leave home – much too comfortable and cushy a berth. This 42 year old has put me through the wringer, at one time I felt trapped in a rusty suit of armor that didn’t make me a knight at all. I felt if you looked inside, you would see the real me trying to get out. And how many times has it brought me to tears, desperation and hopelessness, I don’t want to count.

    I have decided it is no longer ruling my life, I have choices and it is not my identity, only something I have. I have also quit calling it “my” RA. Depending on what you believe, it can be a karma balancing, a contract for this lifetime to experience it or possibly preparation for another lifetime. I am learning to be grateful for it (still not whole hearted yet) plus releasing and clearing old, stuffed down things.

    Keep writing, we need as much humor as possible.

    • Yes! Have you seen Failure to Launch? It’s the kid who refuses to grow up. I love that you don’t call it ‘my RA’ and I think I need to take that heart and no longer claim ownership.

  3. 36 year old with RA here. I realized that I suffer from incontinence when reading your posts.
    My little monster is 6. I’m still working on convincing it to go “find itself” and never return.
    Continue making us laugh!

  4. Your writing style is incredible! I was laughing all the way through…..RA ruled my life at one time too…and the medications made me oh so sick all the time. With the help of a couple doctors (www.GoldbergClinic.com) I was able to reverse my RA completely and get my life back! Medications a thing of the past! I tell people about it everywhere I go.

  5. I was diagnosed this month. I ended up on a wheelchair last Monday at the hospital.
    I didn’t know what I had.
    I’m still trying to understand what I can’t do anymore and the recollection of the moment I was staring a stair without understanding why I couldn’t climb it is still in my mind.
    I need to learn a lot.
    Thank you for your blog.

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