2 steps forward, 12 steps up

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New town, new job, new doctors, new condo…heck, even a new car!

To say I have a lot to wrap my head around right now is a bit of an understatement.

I moved with the best of intentions. I was going to jump in, immediately saturate the marketplace with my awesome sales prowess, sell double my goal, and be the first newbie to ever be invited to the awards trip next year. One week. All inclusive for myself and a guest. Somewhere tropical.

Y’all, I can really see myself there.

I was going to hire a trainer and take control of reshaping my body back to health. And back to a size 6. So I’d look HOT on that beach.

I was going to immediately unpack, pictures on the wall, and keep the entire place immaculate. 

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I mean, how pretty are those stairs? All 12 of them.  (Hold on to that fact, it becomes more important in a moment.)

In short, I was going to either table or dominate everything RA related and get my sh*t together.

I’ve been here a month now. Saleswise, I’m doing well but it is abundantly clear that the only tropical vacay I’ll have this year will be courtesy of the Travel Channel.

I’ve worked out with the trainer twice. I’ve also cancelled twice- once because I just didn’t feel like it and once because I wanted to watch Revenge on my dvr. And then last weekend, I pushed too hard and will find out tomorrow if my ankle is indeed fractured.

A non RA injury. Woot! But 12 stairs to my bed. Un-woot!

Oh yeah. And that whole unpack and keep crap clean? (Cue hysterical laughter.)

But it’s all good. For the first time in a long time, I’ve let myself dream and have goals. Sure, those goals were not necessarily attainable but man, are they fun to think about and to be able to try around people who don’t know you as someone who sometimes struggles.

It’s certainly a jumping (or sliding on my butt down stairs) off point. And it’s been a very long time since I’ve felt the freedom to even try to change.

Being anonymous can be so empowering.

Also empowering? Who attended WAAD last week? For those of you unfamiliar, this was a virtual conference hosted by IAAM to spearhead awareness of autoimmune arthritis. While I find comfort in dreaming big in my anonymity, I’m so thankful for this awareness that will hopefully make it so that patients like me don’t have to feel anonymous to dream big.

4 responses »

  1. I really love your blog! One of my closest friends has RA and it is hard to see her struggle with it every day. I had no idea before her that it literally affects everything you do. I also work with senior citizens every day through medigapgroup.com, and sooo many of my clients suffer from arthritis. It is a terrible disease… I will definitely recommend your blog to my friends and clients. Thanks for sharing.

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